Weather forecast… bad day ahead.

Good morning beautiful people!

I’m at work, battling sleep… it’s going to be a rough day and mentally, I’m not ready. I’ve got interviews from 10:00am to 4:00pm with a thirty minutes break in between. Every day, I pray to God to grant me the patience to deal with my candidates. I pray that He helps me love them like they were my brothers or sisters… but it never works. Bad enough that I already have anger issues.

Add to that the girl with half her titties hanging out of her blouse who strolls in one hour late for her job interview. There’s no point asking why she’s late cos she’s going to say there was traffic, even if her house is behind my office. Either that, or there’s a sick relative in the hospital… or her pussy cat died. You hear all sorts. You remember your days of unemployment when fear never EVER allowed you arrive at an interview late, no matter what. Still, you try to be considerate so you tell her to leave and come back the next day.

But bouncy titties girl doesn’t like that… so the three of them (the girl, her left boob and right boob) all bounce towards my male colleague who is kind enough to see them. Of course he would. In the end, you’re the wicked evil witch who can’t even help her fellow girl…

What about the self-appointed comedian? He’s the one who always has to let his voice be heard… he’s got jokes and he’s always dropping stupid side comments. He knows everything too. He knows how “all these companies used to do” and he knows the best way to answer every possible question. When it gets to his turn, everyone wishes him luck… the ladies are sad to see him go because there’s no one left to entertain them.

He enters a cubicle, the interview begins and he gets stuck in the middle of his first sentence. All his jokes were in pidgin… the wise ass comments were in pidgin… and now you wanna know about his educational background in English. It’s a struggle and he starts to sweat. Also, on his CV it is written that he has exceptional analytic skills. You ask him about it and he says he analyzes football…

Are you on radio? No…

Super Sports? No…

Where then dost thou analyze football exceptionally? Ees in a place around my area.

He will leave and attend another interview somewhere else where he will tell his new audience about how “all diz companies yoos toh’ yoos conekshun to give job”.

Or the obese woman whose husband has asked her to get up off her ass and go find work. When asked why she wants a job, she tells you, “I dunnno… ees my husband that teh’ me.” You wanna ask how in the hell she got an invitation to come for an interview, but then you remember that she’s one of those referred candidates… it’s a favour for a colleague. His friend’s cousin’s pastor’s wife needs a job so he asked you to see her for any available role.

She’s in her mid-thirties with an OND in Eating (Lower credit). You wonder what kind of a man her husband is. At what point did he get fed up of her Telemundo watching? Was it after she ate their kids or after she mistakenly chewed the remote control?

Everybody must get a fair chance, so you go ahead with the interview.

I have to go… it’s going down now.

God help me to love them like my own.

Have a great day people…