I have never in my life felt like less of a woman!!
So I’m at work and there are seven other women in this really large office where we sit. Two are on leave so there are six of us left. Out of the six, three are married women and the other three are single. You guys won’t believe that I AM THE ONLY ONE WHO HAS NOT RECEIVED A CAKE/BOUQUET OF ROSES/GIFT BASKET today!!! I had to run to the bathroom to feel up my tits… just to make sure I still had them, you know… to confirm that I am a woman.
After confirmation, I got back to my empty, gift-less desk with a sad heart and very hard nipples.
I don’t know how I feel about all this… I think I didn’t realize how personally people still take Valentine’s. And I’m wondering; am I that old? It’s been so long since I celebrated Val’s day or even thought about celebrating it. I can’t even remember what I was doing this time last year. Probably housework… I don’t know. But I know I was ok, I wasn’t feeling bad or feeling like I was missing out on something. Maybe because I was at home, not expecting or wanting anything…
Now I feel really awkward… people in this office will probably be wondering what is wrong with me. And if they are half as imaginative as I am, they will probably think I’m a lesbian or they will come up with another equally exotic reason. But even lesbians celebrate Val’s day so that’s no excuse. I’m thinking I should probably order roses or something and have them sent to my office. They’ll be plastic roses of course because I can’t afford the real thing… I’ll have to act shocked too. And when they ask who it’s from, I’ll say that I don’t know “which of them” sent it.
I hope you guys are enjoying your Valentine’s day though. I hope no one is sad, or lonely or hurt… and I hope all intentional side-chicks are suffering pain and neglect and boils… lots of boils.
As for me, I’m glad I survived the day. One of the ladies in my office got promoted so we’re celebrating it. She got caterers and drinks… and I stuffed my face with poundo yam. Then, later, she got a bouquet of fresh roses and two boxes of really really nice chocolates from a secret admirer (her second gift today). Imagine how excited I was when she gave me one of the chocolates 😀
Meanwhile, this morning, another friend of mine saw her boyfriend/fiancé with another babe wearing matching red T-shirts. As if that wasn’t bad enough, she told me that said boyfriend was supposed to be out of town on business… smh. I felt so sorry for her… she was inconsolable. The poor girl looked like she was about to fall apart :’( and it’s shit like this that makes me hate Valentine’s day.
She kept asking what she should do. Should she confront him? Should she act like she doesn’t know? Should she report him to his family? In all this, there was no option to end it so I managed to keep my big mouth shut. I’m sure they’ll sort themselves out eventually… the guy might not even have to come up with an intelligent lie/explanation.
Speaking of pigs, I’ve been eating a lot these days. All the weight I lost just before Christmas, I have managed to pile it back on. I’ll probably start another diet next week… we’ll see how that works out. These days, I barely have time to do anything. I don’t even have time to exercise. Only thing I have time for is work and food and more food.
It’s 6:00pm and I’m ready to go home but I hear that the traffic situation outside is bloody so I’m sitting here trying to make time pass.
Maybe I should open my chocolate while I wait…
You lovers should enjoy the rest of your day 😉