Category: Weird (real life) shit

Birthdays and Gratitude…

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It was my birthday on the 1st of July and I woke up feeling like an ungrateful wench. I think I muttered a brief prayer of thanksgiving, but that was all. I wasn’t angry (I think), but I know I wasn’t exactly overjoyed. I just wanted to stay in bed, watch Tv and have the day go by quickly. I didn’t even go to church, even though I told my mother that I did. By 7:00am, I got a call from the Workers Care department of my church. Turns out that all leaders in church get a cake on their…

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What not to do when there’s a fire.

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On Wednesday, I went to church without eyebrows. I was almost running late and didn’t have the time to draw them on before leaving the house. I figured I would do it in the bathroom in church, but then I got to church and just couldn’t be bothered. I’ve started to care less and less. You’re probably wondering why this is a big deal, right? It’s a big deal because I have serious image issues. Although I don’t know how to wear layers and layers of make-up, I cannot, CANNOT, be caught dead outside without at least eyebrows and lipgloss,…

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Short Quiz: Are you Anointed or Available?

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Hello people! I put together this short quiz for all my Christian readers who are active workers in church. BACKGROUND: I started off by getting acquainted with the subject. After that, I did an extensive literature review, mapped out my objectives and formulated a hypothesis. Then, with the use of an advanced questionnaire software, I created the quiz. This quiz was specifically designed to help you determine your level of anointing. It’s pretty straightforward. You can tally your results at the bottom of the page. Good luck!   QUESTIONS 1. Which one of these scriptures are you told the most…

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Orange flavoured vodka…

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The last time I was this tipsy was at my sister’s wedding… about this same time last year. I was the chief bridesmaid and I didn’t have a major function, but I had lots of small small functions like carrying the heavy tail of the wedding gown, and fanning my sister with one of those fancy folding fans. I remember dancing into the hall with the bridal party and later crying during the couple’s first dance. Other than that, I didn’t get to actually sit and participate in much else until the wedding reception was almost over. As the reception…

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Taxify’s marriage certificate…

, 4

Early one morning, a long time ago in my former office, two senior female colleagues stood by the entrance of the main building. They were huddled together, and they spoke in hushed tones. I saw them but I thought nothing of it because experience had taught me that they could either be deciding the future of someone’s entire career, or they could be expressing grave concerns over what Antonio did to Miguel in last night’s Telemundo episode. The MD arrived while they were still outside. He was such a hard ass. He didn’t like to see people breathe because breathing…

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