About Me!!

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My name is Ngozi Stella Orji. Don’t ever call me Stella. I don’t like it.

It has taken forever to have an “About me” page because I really don’t know how to describe myself. I don’t want to lie and at the same time I don’t want to scare people away.

The most important things you should know:

Yes, I really am cranky but I’m not a bad person. I get easily irritated by things and people around me.  It’s like walking on egg shells whenever I’m around… and that’s on a good day.

I have a mean streak, but I’m also very sensitive. For instance, I would NEVER laugh at you to your face… I would wait until at least five minutes after you’ve left the room.

I love as hard as I hate. I love my family and friends, and I’m fiercely protective over my siblings. A lot of my friends can actually describe me as being a “nice person”. Strangers usually can’t stand me.

I enjoy reading and writing. I LOVE music and I love to dance. I’m a bit of an artist… I draw and sometimes paint, but I haven’t done that in quite a while.

Physically, I’m not terrible. I’m almost always the shortest person in the room :-(. I’m no Beyonce, but I’ve been known to turn a few heads in the past 😉

I hear I wasn’t always this way. I hear I was a cute and chubby child with adorable dimples, always happy and playful.

Well, I’m still fat chubby and I still have my dimples, but they are only noticeable when I’m laughing at someone or making fun of someone.

I’m bound to say stuff that will piss you off, make you laugh or make you cringe. That’s just me. Hopefully, you’ll eventually get to know me well enough to filter the truth from all the BS.

And I promise you my friend, there will be an abundance of BS.

Welcome to my blog.

43 Comments

  1. A fair discription of you…although you’re much nicer than you think, very passionate about the needy & of cause unavoidably the kinda gal that guys easily forget is a chic!!!! Very down to earth being the cause….

    Loving your blog thus far but you seem to be pulling punches…unleach your true self….

    • Awww… Yeah, I have my moments of niceness I guess.
      Yeah, my guy friends usually forget that I’m a gal cos I don’t keep my trap shut when I’m around them.
      On the other hand, people I don’t really know probably think I’m retarded because I don’t say much… I just quietly and watch them and think evil thoughts about them 🙁

      Sweetie, if I unleash any more than this, I’ll be posting nude pics!! And I’m saving the nude pics for later in the year so don’t tempt me now…

  2. ngozi is a sweetheart and very funny. dnt mind her jare, she isnt fat, she is pretty HOTTTTTT.

  3. I remember the first day i met you, You Were putting up this attitude thinking we are spoilt rich kids, but you loved us and we ended up loving you more. You are such a nice person who ends up putting a persons happiness before yours. I thank God for one thing though that i met you on that faithful day!

    • Awwww… Sage, this is so sweet!!!!! I’m glad I met you too! That day, you and Ifeanyi were looking at me like I was an alien. I even felt like an alien.
      I was prepared to hate all of you for no reason but you guys didn’t even let me. I didn’t even know when I fell in love with you all and your wahala.
      Don’t make me miss that school abeg.

  4. i reserve my comments…

  5. I comment my Reserve! Bia NG why do you make the characters of your write-up on this blog so tiny, it’s making me stress my eyez so much, anyways love you shaa!

    • Sweetheart!!!! Welcome to my blog… there should be a VIP section for people like you! Sorry about the characters… just move closer to your screen ok? Love you too sweet. MUAH!!!

  6. eish!!! with dis wondaful revelations we shall surely get u a husband 😉

  7. I know eeeeNGeeee and I can say authoritatively that:
    1. She’s a sweetheart! A huge one
    2. She’s down to earth and while she’s a full time jebby, she can give you enough kpako to make d kpakos go “tuale” for her
    3. She’s a great artist! Her charcoal drawings just take your breath away
    4. If I could, I’d give her the job of manager (maybe HR manager)
    5. Any man who wins her heart, should do cartwheels butt naked in oshodi 😛 he just won a prize people

    • LOOOL!!! Joy! Thanks sweetie… this made me blush badly!
      And as for the man who wins my heart, he should spare us the sight and wear payint (pant) before he does the cartwheels… we don’t need to see the jewels bouncing everywhere 😉

  8. Ok, first thing is this, I don’t like reading and I dislike writing. But for some reason I really can’t point to, I was on TNC.
    Second point, I actually kept scrolling down till I finished reading that post abt ‘chubby’ women, it really got me hooked, that doesn’t happen very often.
    Three, I read all the comments, then I saw yours! OMG, I was doing cartwheels, laughing.
    You now understand why I tapped on your profile… Sha landed here. Girl, you can write. #lobatan.
    PS: My girlfriend must not know I was here, so erm, … Just kidding.

    • Lmao… I won’t tell her if you won’t…
      Thanks so much Odunayo! Means a lot to me…

      ps; My belief is that people who have to convince other people that they don’t like to read or write, actually do both quite well 😉

  9. LOOOOOL.

    This deescription of you is enough to make me your follower! I just read your last two blogposts, and I know I’m gonna be entertained a lot. BS is always a pleasure to read.

  10. Erm….Mmh…Ngozi Orji, my sis from another mum n pop…. I’ve known you for quite a bit n its been like forever… I must say never had a dull moment with you although time spent was short n I never wanted it to end….Description:A chatter box that listens, she is smart, neat,xelzy in her curvy self (her meaning of fat) calm n calculated Igbo babe dat doesn’t look or sound like one(this means I like the way u select ur words n mix them up to get heard)… A super cook, I testify … N it goes on n on….she tells u as it is, no gray areas…I’m pleasured to read u here….

    • LMAO!!! Awwww Chi-Chi…. Thanks luv. That’s SO sweet… You dey bust my head!
      Hopefully, we’ll see soon. I was at Ghene’s over the weekend. Hurry up and come so that we can paint the town red 😀 and I promise not to sleep off and leave you awake… 😉

      lol@ chatterbox that listens 😀

  11. From all I’ve read, I can deduce that you’re adorable. A total package. You sure won’t change being who u are for anything in the world.

  12. oluwafemi hoseaw,

    Want u Bw ms friend

  13. really love ur write ups. Wish i could write like u

  14. Sis……you can write and you are soooo funny!!! Kudos..

  15. NgoBabe.
    You are as perfect as your writting skills.
    Your words always make me laugh… Always.
    Miss ya loads

  16. Hey there Stella! Oops, my bad! I didn’t just call you that did I now?! Am innocent, I swear I am! These fingers of mine have a life of their own and they just go off! Soweee! *giggling*

    So, I was pointed in your direction by the mighty talented, delightful Dr Swag, Ezechinyere Ekpo; and just between us gurls, dude’s ‘coooooreeeeiiizzzyyy’ ’bout you! You shoulda been here to see him rave ’bout this new blog he just discovered! Plus, I don’t normally do this; rat my friends out that is; but I just gotta hint you! You can thank me later, no charge! LMAO

    Your About page’s ’bout the most interesting I’ve read in a bit! Keep keeping on sis, you’re a breath of fresh air! Cheers! LOL

    • Erm… wow. I think I’m actually speechless. Thanks (I think).
      And many many thanks to Dr Swag, even though I haven’t been a very faithful blogger. Funny thing is, I actually thought he was a girl cos of the name ‘Ezechinyere’ ( ._.)

  17. Never met you before but I can boldly say I love you already. Your blog is arguably my best find of the year. I love your sense of humor.

  18. Yemie oooooo…you are somefink else!

  19. Oh lyrical genius! I know right?! I just ratted you out, despicable me! At least if anything good came outta this, Ngozi now knows you’re a bloke! LMAO!

  20. LOL!!!…now you have completely cracked me hup!!!! You have brought your eternal mischief to Ngo’s blog….

  21. Before now, I have read some of your posts on tnc & throughly enjoyed them. So today, while I was stuck at home ill, miserable & depressed, I decided to faff around & visit your blog. Just finished reading every post. Thank you very much. I love your wicked and sometimes morbid sense of humour. Keep ’em coming

  22. You give yourself way to little credit dear… 🙂

  23. Ngozi, hmmmm never thot you will go into this. What happened to all the cooking and baking? Nice blog girl ,keep it up. Miss u plenty

    • Sweetheart, it’s been too long oh… chai! I miss you too 🙁
      I’m still cooking and baking jor, but work doesn’t give me time to do it like I did back home, at least not on a commercial scale. Thank you Efe :-*
      Hope you’re doing good.

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